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Saturday 25 June 2016

Awesome Jokes


                                   Jokes        






       



Because married men are more obedient.

Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?
Bant reply:

Because married men are more obedient.




Dont carry umbrella during rain

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Bantas advise:-
Dont carry umbrella during rain
Keep WHISPER on ur head
ye ghanto tak geelepan
ka ahsas nahi hone deta:D




Lion bounced on wife


In an African Safari,A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.
WIFE-Shoot him! Shoot him!
SANTA-Yes Yes.I'm changing d battery of my camera..




Santa in court


SANTA went to court
JUDGE:
"Order ! Order !"
SANTA:
"1 Pizza, 2 Dosa, 3 Idli & 1 Cold-drink !"
JUDGE:
"Shut Up !"
SANTA:"No,No..7-Up!




Headlights and wipers

After an accident,
A v.angry driver: I showed u d headlights
& told u 2 go by side.
Santa: I also started d wipers
& said No, no..No no. :D




Cut workload by 50%


Salesman:This computer will
cut your workload by 50%.
Santa:That is great,
I will take two of them:p




Theif entered kitchen

Santa: Look a thief has entered our kitchen
and he is eating the cake I made.
Banta: Whom should I call now,
Police or Ambulance?




                                 MORE

                                 JOKES






Santa was drawing money from ATM.

Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta, who was just behind him in
the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****.
Sant: U r wrong. It's 1394.




Kissing ur wife in ur home....

A man to Santa:
Your friend is kissing your wife in your home.
Santa rushes home and came back within
half an hour and slapped the man
and said:
"He's not my friend."




A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell,
Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies,
I'm coming daily since 4 days,
I press the bell but no one comes out.








Titanic was sinking.


Titanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction (left or right)?
Santa: Downwards!





Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.


Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made in India
Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan
Interviewer : Good... Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Bad.... Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don't take my seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn't say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You appoint me




What a shot you made - santa singh

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (47 votes, average: 3.62 out of 5)
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An astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope.
Santa Singh was observing him, suddenly a star falls.
Seeing that Santa Singh shouted, �what a shot you made!�




Thats a lucky match stick

Santa Singh tried to light his cigarette. He struck the first match on the match box, but it didnt light.
He tried another, It didnt light too. The third one finally lit his cigarette, carefully blew the match out and put it in his vest pocket.
�What for did you put that match in your vest pocket?� asked the another man.
Santa replied, �Thats a lucky match stick. Ill use it again.�




U r just trying 2 make me jealous.

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (40 votes, average: 3.70 out of 5)
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Preeto 2 maid:
Oh Kanta, I have reason 2 suspect that
Banta is having an affair with his secretary.
Kanta: I don't believe it!
U r just trying 2 make me jealous.




Banta to his new bride

Banta to his new bride, Preeto,
�Now that we are married,
do you think you will be able
to live on my small income?�
�Of course, dear, no trouble,� she replied.
�But what will you live on?�




I will never marry in my life

Banta ask santa: what will you
advise your children about marriage?
Santa declares: I'll never marry in my life and
I'll give same advice to my children also.


                                                                                                                                   - 4 Young Gen

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